Yvonne Foong -

Oh, Holy goat. My head hurts. The back of my head, sometimes on my forehead. And also on the left. My backbone aches too. I've to consume about 30 pills a time, three times a day. Each time, I take 8 pills for my brain, 1 for stomach, 2 pain killer, 2 for I don't know what, 10 pills of spirulina, and a cup of organic drink mixed with orange juice. That means, I take 100 pills a day. Gosh, why am I feeding on these? It doesn't make me any better. But ofcourse, I cheat la. I sometimes skip the pain killer and the 2 dunno-what pills. But it's still a lot. Yewin said he wants to visit me at home. He's nice but it's pretty inconvinient here. Poor fella's so busy at college, IMU. And he once told me that he's thinking of being a neurologist!! I really miss choir. My voice's still damaged from my recent sore throat. I really want to attend choir. But I can't walk. Besides, they're busy doing preparations for the school play, which I wanted a role badly. And it'll be so embarassing to pop by. At first, I thought of attending choir next Tuesday before returning to the hospital. But then again, I can't walk. *sob*

I'm home! I'm home! Home leave, that is. I still have to return to the hospital on the 6th and then get my spine surgery done on the 8th. Later on, my brain. GH's not that bad after all. Accept for poor facilities, unorganised infrastructures, noisy environment and the list goes on. I didn't like it at first, but got used to it later. I get to meet many people there whose faith are more or less the same. They're all very friendly patients, better than the nurses. The food isn't that bad after all. Cuz they cook with oil and steamed but mixed with curry or sweet & sour sauce. Yum! That's better than nothing. GH has everything but a vet. HeHe!! But my stay kinda freaks. In the week that I was warded, 3 patients died. They were too old to take the pain after surgery. I give them my sympathy, but I can do nothing. And another lady was dead for awhile last night, but whose heartbeat was later revived by the ward doctor. My doctors are all very nice. Especially my neuro consultant! She's so sweet, she even let me in to the doctor's private discussion on my case. ^_^ Dear, I miss it there. But I'll be back there soon, in another 5 days. Don't I sound different? A tad more bubbly isn't it? Well, I still feel sad but much better than before. I'm beginning to accept faith. I thought I was alone, but nope, in the hospital, there are people with worse conditions. So I count myself lucky. My whole class was supposed to visit me this weekend, no looks like it they'll come next week. N a few other teachers too. Now I wonder how is the hospital going to accomodate so many ppl... hmmm...

I'm totally tired and worn out. Gave Yuki a call but his line was engage so I came online to blog instead. I wanted to have a talk with him but too bad. I'm surely gonna miss him dearly in the hospital. Had lunch with my friends and then went to play snooker and had dinner at the Rahman Putra golf club at night. David called and said he would pay me a visit. How nice of him... Will be dropping by at school tomorrow morning to get a student letter from the office and then head straight for admission at the hospital. Kenneth, you think I should tell Yuki? Oh, very well... ((Pn. Khoo was arguing with the class one day about pink is for girls and blue is for boys. and Yuki wore pink today))

Gack! Spent Ee Von lunch yesterday at McD. Stayed and yack until 5pm. Her mom gave me a lift home. (we are great friends since std1) Her mom: Ming Niang! Leaving your hair long again? Yvonne: Yeah, but shaving bald soon. Her mom: huh? Yvonne: Gonna do a surgery on my brain. Her mom: What?!!!!!? r u joking? Later had dinner with Swee Hong, Amy and Felicia. They came and picked me up at 8pm. Drove over to Ryu Men Tei and the food was delicious. But not as good as the Japanese buffet in Holiday Villa. Owen couldn't make it and so as Yewin. He had to have dinner with parents while the latter was still in Uni. Later, having lunch again with Tremayne, Alicia, Elena and Kenrick at McD. Have been eating a lot of McDs lately. Now down with a sore throat but I couldn't care more. Must max out before eating healthy food in the hospital. Tremayne, I'll tell you who Yuki is if you pay me a visit in GH. :-Þ blehhh...

My diagnosis - Neurofibromatosis Type 2 (NF2) Chromosom 22 There is a castle on a cloud, I'd like to go there in my sleep, Aren't any floors for me to sweep, Not in my castle on a cloud. There is a room that's full of toys, There are a hundred boys and girls, Nobody shouts or talks too loud, Not in my castle on a cloud. There is a lady all in white, Holds me and sings a lullaby, She's nice to see and she's soft to touch, She says, "Cosette, I love you very much", I know a place where no one's lost, I know a place where no one cries, Crying alone is not allowed, Not in my castle on a cloud. I always wanted to sing this song but now, I'll never make it to play Young Cosette in the school's Les Miserable reproduction. I was in the hospital yesterday. My group of surgical doctors decided to admit me on Monday for KIV and probably get the surgery done on Wednesday or Thursday. They will start removing the tumors along my spine first. After I recover that, then they'll dig open my brain. Now, that's dangerous and I'm praying hard to live through it. Went to school this morning with mummy. Passed my medical report and medical chit to Shireen, to be given to my class teacher when she returns from her History course. Spoke to Pn. Loo for a while and then headed upstairs to the office and gave the headmistress another copy of the medical report. I bet she doesn't give a damn about that paper cuz I don't understand it either. Then mummy and I sat at the canteen, ate nasi lemak and fruits. They say that canteen food is yucky and unhygenic. To me, that's not quite so. I especially adore their nasi lemak. I personally can't intake too spicy food that it makes me puke. But those sold at the canteen are just nice. Knowing that I will not be able to taste it for a very long time. We also got one pack for my dad. I should've went during recess hour. Then I can meet Yuki. Lisa, Thank you very much for the present. Thank your mom for me too, okay? Now I've these books to keep me company when I'm bedridden. The straw-made roses are very sweet. Did you fold them yourself? And the little card too! also thank you to Fenix and Himiko

It's not right to state this matter online. But having silly assumptions made by friends, I better spill this... Ok, so I've got my diagnose. It's er.... Neuroblablabla...blablabla...II..chromosom 22. Can't remember the scientific name of it. It's written on a sheet of paper for me but it's in the car and I don't want to creep all the way down the stairs just to get one piece of paper. So, I'm lack of chromosoms. Does this make me a mutant? And it couldn't be genetically developed cuz my parents are healthy!! no fair! We went over to one hospital to have a MRI scan on my brain and spine. It's freaky at first...lying on a not-so-comfortable bed/table and being pushed into a vault. Even with the headphones on, the machine still sounded like machine guns, drills, and hard-knocking sounds, so loud! And in the headphone, was played some oldie songs that I know but are not interested in. But I couldn't fall asleep as well. It was so noisy!! I had 3 scanning sessions. The third one, they placed this thing on my head for..i dunno what. They also gave me an injection to highlight the fault in me. Gosh, in the 1st and 2nd scan, done consecutively, my body went numb and sweated hard. I needed a break so badly that I was given one, a very long one that lasted for about 2 hours. The doctor at that hospital said that he had never seen such a big stack of scans of a patient before. After receiving the report, I went back to my hospital and waited there was my doctor. She was so sweet to stay back for me. The building was evacuated when I arrived, 4pm. She explained my condition to me, which happen to be VERY SERIOUS. There are two tumors in my brain. One behind my eye, affecting my hearing ability and eyesight. The other tumor is on the top part of my brain. THEN there are MULTIPLE tumors along my spine. They are located in a way that caused my spine to be in the wrong position. That probably took away the strength on my legs. Heck, why do these growths have to be in two most important body part of mine? Tomorrow, I've to be there again in the morning to see the operation surgeon to discuss about what to do. Ofcourse, he'll also be having a conference with other doctors on this matter. Then maybe, I'll have to be there for quite some time... again...I'll be missing Yuki badly. I may sound cool in here but no, I'm so friggin' afraid. I've been seing people leaving me one by one and I don't want to be next. Doc said my case is difficult, especially the ones in my brain. I've so many things planned up in life. I still need to sit for my SPM, go through college, gain PhD, be a Psychologist, have my own family and three kids. okay maybe one would do but look now what? Why does silly things always happen on me? We always thought this have got to do with my bones but no! I've got tumors! I see my future so perfectly and I really wish to own it. I really do! They say that we control our own lives and future, I believe in that all these while. I thought that I control my life! I behold everything I do and no one other than me myself. But now I realize that life isn't fair when it comes to this problem. Maybe it's my sin that I've accumulated, but ONE TUMOR IS WORSE ENOUGH LAH!! why gimme so many?!?!?!? Doc told me to be optimist. I want to. But the more I think about it, the more I chill. And mom's so pesimist she said I shouldn't go for the surgery as I might risk my life but holy goat NO! I want to cure! I want recovery! and have my family of three kids! or maybe one! DAMN!! Hey people up there, you hear me? I'm sweet 16 and I got my whole supposedly journey ahead of me! I was brought up to earn merits by doing good and I've yet to start and will soon. Why can't you people just allow me to do so?!? you would right? *sob* you better give me a chance cuz I still need to revamp my stupid ugly website into a useless e-album. To leave a print of myself online... but anyway, just incase I don't get to say.. I LOVE YOU PEOPLE!!

Serious thing...Saw the neurologist today. She did some examinations on me and sent me for X-ray on my brain and spine. She was very nice. There's supposed to be a meeting for her to attend tomorrow but she's willing to come check on me and my urgent case. *hugs* Will be going for a MRI scan tomorrow morning and most probably be hospitalized. *sob* Sure gonne miss Yuki badly when I'm there. Fenix, thanks for letting me know. actually, 56k at my place is good, but streamyx will do better. K-Chan, so you better get it. and get it quick! ^__^

Doc said my bones are very healthy. No signs of injuries or so. I'm going for a brain check tomorrow with the neuromedic. Burning more chromosoms and it better be good...

Nothing, I just bond interest with Daisuke. His red hair...looks like Gokun from DragonBall. First saw it on Kyle's site. Added a few blog affiliates and removed some trash. Mystical Illusion should take a new look sometime soon. Have to wake up early tomorrow for my medical appointment, skipping exam. Got no choice but to do so. If you don't see me blogging, I'm hospitalized...

oh so bored. I miss Yuki!!. It's like, I see him today and I'll miss him tomorrow, that's how my feeling runs. I'm pretty much of a stay put in one place and can't move at all to go stalking him. I admire how many couples actually get to meet each other everyday and then get bored of it over the times. Yuki's not my other half, but I miss him as much. O___o There's not many friends that I can spill this to, so I blogged it. I rang Cia Ee up to ask her about choir. And after obtaining the answer, she went on ranting about her honey bun that made me real jealous. Envy, to be exact. She asked me if her half is handsome and cute. To please her, I said "YES'. But God knows Yuki's the best... Apart of that, I'm also happy cuz I signed up for Streamyx!! yeay! yeay! Now I can download anime from the internet!! yeay!! But the technicians are only coming with my new modem in a few weeks time. If it wouldn't be for streamyx, I won't d/l anime cuz one episode goes up to 150mb and I'll go broke before I actually get to watch it. Finally, I feel NO FAIR! Lee Hom's concert is tomorrow and I can't go! damn, it just have to be held in the wrong time!! I can afford a couple hundred bucks tickets on my own and yet I can't go!! *sob* Fenix, I showed my friend who Touya was today when we saw him in school while going home. We couldn't help ourselves but to laugh aloud like fools. Cuz Touya went walking up and down and round and round the area with a funny looking sour face he made. Did he loose his sheep? Cheryl, Glad to hear frrom your blog, finally! Seems like your friends are leaving you gradually, aren't they? oh well, guess it's time you should start living on your own.

Okay, so the choir have a new board of directors and it sux!! Life's just very unfair around here!! They made me the form 5 Rep. and I definitely worth more than this crap!! I know at least I didn't get kicked out of the board, but still...not a REPRESENTATIVE!! And then, what's next? Hanizah the President?!? sick ah?? Yes she's bubbly and talks around but....hey!! I remember she telling me that she's gonna quit choir after the Ipoh trip and now what? She the president?? Hey! That girl is so not serious!!! Then Kelly is the vice president? Look, sincerely I think Kam Zing is worth more being in that post. Kam Zing's so much more matured!! Then? Cia Ee the treasurer?? WTF!! She joined the choir for less than half a year and now she's the treasurer? GAWD!! I tell you that this whole darn thing is so wrong. These bunch of people are really not worthy of their posts! Joel said it the other day, he said it himself !! Through that big and gigantic mouth of his that they also select by voice quality and it's no use having someone who's voice's not nice. And look now what? Let me state this, Sara Ho and Esther Loh have voices 10x better than everyone else and why aren't they given a post? Besides, both Esther and Sara are very trust worthy and a lot more serious in their jobs! This can be fairly seen in their prefects duty!! Gawd life is just so unnerving and this sux big time!! I finally get it, those people in choir are all buyers! Because everyone in those big posts are practically close to the form fives. Form 5 rep, fine, I'm after all the vice prez of the computer club and we all know what's up next year so who gives a damn since my presidency job is sure gonna make a mark in my testimonial. And God knows if that is actually the main reason I got a useless post here. But hey big people there in choir, sometimes you just have to play things fair!! Now God pleaseeee let me be Young Cosette. To make up for that choir rubbish!!

Doey's getting old and her brain's beginning to cheat. I forgot to blog last night. So here goes... Yesterday, school went well. I was early and was all alone in the dark, in class. Popped open my Literature book and started reading when two fifth formers stepped in and talked to me until the bell rang.....when the bell went off at 12:30pm, my classmates left me alone to sit in class and enjoy the wind blow under the fan. I never thought those choir folks would be so on time, by time I went up to the BBM room, everyone was already there. So, I planted my butt and there it was for the rest of the two hours watching Les Miserables on VCD. After that, we were at the front gate, looking at Melvin's class pic until my mom came to bring me home. There is a castle on a cloud, I'd like to go there in my dreams, Aren't any floors for me to sweep, Not in my castle on a cloud. Wishing I could be young Cosette in the school play, Cuz I'm born with a child's voice and I suit to sing that song. But slim chance.... Today, I was startled and waken up by this unknown idiot who rang my room phone for two rings. Or else, I could've gotten a longer sleep. darn...

Yuki is so so kawaii!! YeeEE! *pinches ownself* he has this rozzy cheek of his and...and...just perfect!! My cheeks turned pink and I hope he doesn't notice! oh well, there's so much I want to rant about but just can't. I shouldn't made my blog so publicised, then I can rant as much issues as I want! so, Kenrick and I were yacking in class and then came his very perverting topic and I just hate that freak...guys..... anyway, I know..i know it's guilty to miss school for a week...but but... teachers and friends in school don't have to say I'm down with REUMATISM and PHEUMONIA!! gosh...that's terrible!! First of all, I'm 16 and it's very rare for girls my age to have reumatism. Then, I'm up and really up in school, how can I've pheumonia?? People just can't use their brains. Then what, Tremayne said I've got a tumor? *faint* do I look so sick and pale? btw, I found out that my leg appointment is on the first day of the July exams...*snigger* you won't know what they'll do to me...heh! heh! heh! uh Lisa, I ain't joining that alone you know. Fenix,oh, so u played volleyball with Pn. Zubaidah? Did you get her signature? haha!! just joking. it's no big deal la. Well, the next time you see her, get close in contact and probably provoke her to develope our school into a woman-in-power kinda place. Female dominant one... okay?...and if u think yer little Touya's so great, I can tell u that MY Yuki's the best!!!!!!!!! muahahaha!! okay so Doey glomped her brains again. oh by the way, I've not been seing Touya around, was hiding in my tempurung class and know nuts about the life about. ah, K-Chan, mangas in what language then? VHS? haha! -whoops-

There I've merged the links of Little House. I've to admit, the layout is VERY simple, but I think people who actually surf it thoroughly is more into the contents that I've put up. Lee Hom's gonna have a concert and I can't go!! Gawd how am I supposed to express my feeling....it's so unfair! I went to collect my X-Ray today, it's so so blur, should've gone for laser, and my appointment doesn't come until Lee Hom's concert is over. I can't help myself but to....yell...ahhhhh!!! And...and...school! what, they're taking the memo as a stupid con or something? Or I don't look serious enough? Ok, so I'm gonna bring my attorneys and doctors and UNDERTAKERS! to go raid school tomorrow. And see what they do... I even had to skip choir today and I didn't get to see Eriol, awwww......*sob* miss...miss!! ok...I better go dig some stuffs to put up at Little House.

Made a dedication shrine for Lee Hom! Visit it here. No pictures are uploaded yet, need to settle some problem before that. While uploading my files, I suddenly thought of merging all Lee Hom links onto one page. This was because I left out the guestbook link and was lack of space to fit another link in. But I can't really do it tomorrow, I'm going to the hospital again. Hopefully, tomorrow night. I better sleep early today, or else the doctor would be surprised so check on a panda. Nite~! Nite~!