Yvonne Foong -

HEY GUYS, DON'T BE SURPRISED WHEN U SEE THIS PAGE BEING IN A MESS. IT'S JUST THAT I'M ON THE MOVE BUT HAVEN'T FOUND ANY GOOD PLACES YET SO....

Okay so Mika decided to kick my butts off. *sigh* now I've to find a new nest to settle in. *doey seaches around* any recommendations?

I'm SOOO tired. Life's SOOOO tiring. The chinese say no matter what you do, your backbone must be STRAIGHT. I'm keeping mine really straight but what good does it make? Just gives me pains and pains and moe pains. *sigh* Yesterday, we had a COMPUTER CLUB MEETING!!! And I wasn't there. We all didn't know about it because Alicia and I were in class during assembly and Elena must have been elsewhere I supposed. I went home after school as usual but Elena and Alicia stayed back. Bu they got some people asking them about the meeting at the canteen and they told them there was no meeting but Mr. Sim turned up!!! Ah...I think he's a little moved about my absense but was more pissed at Rajan the secretary. KeKeKe!! Cuz he didn't go too. But anyway, Elena and Alicia helped me with the AGM, successfully elected the new committees and annual plans. Phew!! And surprisingly there were mostly BOYS again! Ok, so tomorrow I've a choir committee meeting. Better remember that....cuz this Izzat have been telling around that he took over my post which is a false alarm. I better show up before the teacher have my neck off. Hey, u know my mom bought this sushi matt and now I can ROLL SUSHI!! They're really nice to roll especially now that I can do it. yum! U know, when I fist learnt to make sushi I vowed that when I become an expert I'd make a lunch box for Yuki. Now, I can do that no more when he goes across the sea. Oh ya I finally got the bookmark with Yuki's name on it from Florence. Ordered from a classmate last year but Florence damaged it before I can even get my hands on it so the girl made another with Florence paying. But then I was admitted so I couldn't have it until now. Now I look at it, it would have better use with Yuki himself cuz he's a bookworm. Well, at least we ALL think so.

*sigh* I really don't know how to say this....it's really bothering me. I don't really know whether my mom loves me. What am I saying? Ofcourse she loves me but her words hurt me a lot. She always say things to me like, "don't put high hopes, no one's gonna marry you" "you're sick and people are afraid that you're a burden" "no one's gonna take care of you when you grow old" "your friends won't like you when they know your problems " "their parents won't let their daughter be with you" "their parents dislike you"...everytime I hear this I feel like someone had just stabbed me at the heart. She thinks that by saying those stuffs will help me but she doesn't know that it hurts even if I told her so. I know that I am ugly even my own mom is afraid of me. Whenever she finds me hard to look at, she'll say, "your eyes....u're so ugly" I know! I know! I'm ugly but where is all the human compassion? Has human changed for the worse? There's not even a single day in my life now that's without grief and tears. Everyday I will have people eyeing me at the corner. They stare at me like a weird creature from Mars. Everytime I notice, I feel like throwing up at them but I always remind myself, "it's okay, they are just curious" I'm giving people so many chances and I try to understand them. But who understands me?!? This world stinks!! Nobody understands me. Maybe my mom is right. I am a big burden to everyone. And nobody wants to befriend me. I'm so ugly that I scare everyone off. Even Yuki said I scared him when we first met!...I'm worthless to be alive...I'm nothing in this world. I was just born the wrong way!! in the wrong world!! In the wrong time!! But I know it's a sin to kill myself no matter how much I want to die. Life is so dificult I'm beginning to hope that it'll end soon. really soon...I'm tired of all this since I was a little girl. And I hate it very much. I want to go home...

You know what? A relative wanted a piece of article as remembrance of my late aunt so my dad wanted to give away a cross-stitch art. It's a work of pictures and alphabets. It was made for me when I was a toddler. So I screamed at my dad and told him off on the face. Then, he wanted to take another one which is the picture of ballet shoes hanging in our living room. HE MUST BE OUT OF HIS MIND!! If he ever takes a single stuff of my aunt away from me I'm gonna KILL HIM!! Wow...everytime the issue about school and disciplinary is brought up, there sure is someone somewhere to kick up a ruckus. U see if you never noticed, there's this white color suggestion box hung outside the teacher's room. So you might wanna consider dropping a note there?

Today's really freaky. First, when I sat in class during assembly, Mr. Saufharddy saw me and told me to go to the canteen and I had to listen to that bloody long disciplinary lecture. Then when the teachers dismissed, I tried looking for Mr. Sim but couldn't and instead was kinda turned off by the HEM. My class was just a few steps ahead and I told her it's difficult to walk but she insisted I follow the rest, take ONE BIG ROUND and said in malay, "just follow the rest! don't you have legs to walk?" so I went back to class and cried a little when nobody was there. During Economy Asas, Pn. Chong was reading out the notes when she spotted me doing something else... teacher: Wei Yvonne! me: ya? teacher: u dropped econs izzit? me: yah teacher: alright some student: I also want to drop! teacher: shut up! It's really funny there especially when this teacher doesn't allow the rest to drop. It's quite ridiculous cuz we live in a free country~!! ah anyway, i brought sushi to school today and ate them during lunch break...

This is such a difficult life...I wanna fly to never neverland with Fenix!! I've been quite busy these past few days. I'm bombarded with the heavy burden of a webmaster. I got the entire phpbb onto the school server but didn't know it can't support SQL. Now, Ben and Rajan agree to change host, AGAIN!! We've been changing host every year and again? But they'll do that so I'll just leave them alone. I tried a new layout but when I was about to finish, the table broke!! So I just saved it for another day. But one thing nice is that Mr. Sim was smiling when he spoke to me the other day, PHEW!! I told Pn. Chong I wanted to drop Econs today and insisted that Pn. Loo allowed but then....she kinda make me doubt it when she started teaching. Econs seem like a whole new subject to me now. It's not as boring as how my past teacher taught me. Now, should I really drop? She said it's easy to score. Today, I had an ajk meeting with my committee. Last time, I used to think that David and Trey should have open discussions like when everyone can bring up their voices. But now that it is coming true for me, I find it stupid cuz all my ideas are being disagreed and my original plans are altered so many times I don't even know what's happening. *sigh* I wish Trey's there for me so I can have someone to count on. Now, what am I doing? Everyday I would switch on my computer, load hotmail and look for Yuki's new mail in my inbox. But nope, he hasn't written. Did he receive that mail? Did he read and didn't want to reply? Did he not check his mail at all? Until he replies, I'll be in this 'worry' everyday. One day more...another day another destiny...

My Gawd this is so damn funny I almost got crams. You see people, the names, I just crapped everyone out of mind and so it's not my fault that it turned out like this. Boy...I hope the other guys never read this...or they'll probably kill me! oh yah and this thinggie is actually made via e-mail. Some fwd thinggie. Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! JERRY: Tonight on the Jerry Springer show we have a particularly interesting episode! Yvonne is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend of hers Alicia. So everyone please put your hands together for Yvonne! Jerry: Okay, now Yvonne you're here to talk about someone aren't you? You: Yes. Jerry: And what is this other persons name? You: Tremayne. The crowd SQUEALS with delight. Jerry: Okay, okay, well Tremayne, is actually here tonight - The crowd SQUEALS. Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you Yvonne, because as it happens there is someone else here to see YOU! So let's bring out... Elena! You: What the HELL!!! Out of nowhere you pull out a Light Saber. Elena reaches for the cupboard. Out of the shadows David appears. David: Wait everybody wait! Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First tell us why you're here Elena. Elena: Because I saw Yvonne and David making out at hospital! The crowd goes absolutely INSANE. David: That's a lie! I was home watching FRIENDS! Jerry: (raising his hands) Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here...what exactly IS the problem Elena? Elena: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Alicia who has recently become engaged to David. The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement. Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Alicia out here because Yvonne had something that they needed to tell them anyway about... Tremayne that's right! Alicia: (enters onto stage and saunters over towards you) What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Tremayne! You know I'm how I feel about Tremayne!. David: (screams) What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Tremayne! Alicia: Because I knew that I could never have Tremayne. But Yvonne promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings! David: What about respect for MY feelings! Elena walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Alicia. Elena: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me. Again the crowd SQUEALS. David: Oh my God! Are you SICK! David runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly. David: Yvonne take me away from all of this! You: You see? That's the thing...I'm...well, I'm married... The crowd does its bit. David: Married? You nod. David: Who the hell are you married to? When...when did this happen? I don't understand! You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Tremayne. Alicia: (screaming) WHAT!!! Jerry: (grinning widely, makes an enquiry) So...did you have a nice wedding night? Tremayne: (stepping back out onto center stage) Well we had sex 5 times if that's what you mean. The crowd squeals. Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight... Yvonne is married to Tremayne who Alicia has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Alicia has recently become engaged to David who was recently spotted kissing Yvonne in the hospital. Now on top of this Elena has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Alicia. Tremayne: That's right Jerry. Jerry: (looking sternly into the camera) It is times like these that one has to wonder, whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks it's been great but for now...it's goodnight. Queue cheesy background music and fade to black.

School's going to begin on Monday but I have just met one very big obstacle in my life. When I stop writing about Yuki here doesn't mean I stop loving him. I really don't know what to say but I'm beginning to realize how important Yuki is to me. It started off with an infatuation which grew into a crush. Over the times, the liking feeling develops and until now, it became true love. At the begining of the year 2002, I told myself that I will appreciate that year well because it is the last year that I will be able to meet Yuki in real. But then, something came upon and I'm bounded from school. And now that I'm here, I did not tell him the truth for dignity. And when I finally decided to scrap dignity for Yuki, he's gone. HE'S GONE~!! Is this all my fault? I did not say earlier for being afraid that he might not share my feelings. I really don't know what else to say here. Everything's already written in an e-mail. I hope he replies. And I hope the reply'd be good. *sob* ........

They laugh at me, those fellows, just because I am small, They laugh at me because I'm not a hundred feet tall, I told them that there's lots to learn down here on the ground, The world is big, but little people turn it around. A worm can roll a stone, A bee can sting a bear, A fly can fly around Vasaille cause flies don't care, A sparrow in a hat can make a happy home, A flea can bite the bottom of the Pope in Rome! Golliath was a bruiser who was tall as the sky, But David threw a right and gave him one in the eye, I never read the Bible but I know that it's true, It only goes to show what little people can do. So don't pick on me because I'm small!! U know what people? I woke up eating Pasta but the gravy tastes bad so I've gotta ask Elena how do make 'em later. I've just sorted out my books. I've like about 20 text books, over 20 work books, 30 over pocket reference books, 13 big reference books, exam papers and plentiful of notes. I can open a book store!! Elena's coming later to help me pick books to keep. Because they're from my twin cousins and one of them did science and they gave me books that I don't need too. Then Oi Wan also gave me some notes that she made last time. There's this "Simpulan Bahasa" book from the twin's elder brother, Ken Nee and I've no idea why the hell he stached that in. I shall keep myself online while waiting for Elena the Savior...

I've got a new haircut! It's now short again...before this, I had it 2-3 inches below my neck and now it's short again. So refreshing!! Cool, Justin got me this handphone bag from China with the word, "prosperity" in it. Nice!! Well, actually, nothing really happened much today. Just the haircut, dat's all... and school in 4 days time!! OMG